New iPhone Reviews
The new Apple iPhone4 is getting universally good reviews. The best part of the phone is it gets the geeks out of your office while they wait on line for five days to buy it.



McChrystal in Trouble
President Obama may fire General Stanley McChrystal for making controversial comments to a reporter for Rolling Stone magazine. The entire decision depends on whether the White House can find anyone who still reads Rolling Stone.



Housing Predictions
A new survey of economists shows that 56% of economists surveyed now say housing prices will fall this year... the other 44% live in Manhattan.



Britain Budget Cuts
Britain's government has unveiled massive new budget cuts. Government workers will be fired, school spending will be slashed, and Fergie has to switch from Crystal to Schlitz.



Global Warming Survey
A new survey shows that 97% of scientists believe in man-made climate change. The other 3% know that being politically correct still won't get them a date.





June 23rd


1611: The mutinous crew of Henry Hudson's fourth voyage sets Henry, his son and seven loyal crew members adrift in an open boat in what is now Hudson Bay; they are never heard from again and presumed killed by the hair gel and fumes coming off Staten Island.


1794: Empress Catherine II of Russia grants Jews permission to settle in Kiev. Sure, everyone in Kiev still hated Jews, but there's only so long you can wait to have a decent bagel.


1989: The Supreme Court rules that a law banning all sexually oriented phone message services is unconstitutional... thus allowing Members of Congress to resume calling their interns.