Pot Poll
A new LA Times poll shows 49% of Californians favor legalizing marijuana, 41% oppose it, and the other 10% are really worried about longer lines at Taco Bell.



Israel Condemned
The UN Security Council says Israel used too much force to stop a ship filled with activists bringing supplies Hamas. The council says Israel should have known that 99%of activists will run away if you simply offer them a real job.



Bats in Danger
Hundreds of caves are being closed to hikers to help protect a threatened bat population. Actually, the bats just want to be left alone by a growing number of annoying "Twilight" fans.



Arizona Reaction
The League of United Latin American Citizens, say they will be ready to sue immediately if they feel citizens were questioned improperly by authorities in Arizona. But this is the same group that is threatening to boycott everyone who isn't watching the George Lopez Show.



BP Deal
The good news is BP is going to give Louisiana fisherman 100% compensation for their lost wages based on their tax returns. The bad news is Louisiana fishermen haven't paid their taxes since the Civil War.






June 1st


1935: The first driving tests are introduced in the United Kingdom. Sadly, the original applicants are still trying to parallel park in Trafalgar Square.


1974: The Heimlich maneuver for rescuing choking victims is first published in the journal Emergency Medicine. It is also later approved for use on Cubs fans.


2009: General Motors files for chapter 11 bankruptcy... UAW members breifly have to get their own Viagra.