Monday, October 27, 2008

That chicken insists on doing a meme...

Newsflash: I recently read about a campaign aimed at alleviating poverty and thought some of you may be interested in following it up. Called the Worldwide Blogger BakeOff Challenge, the campaign aims to raise $1million to help address issues of starvation in Africa. Actions include sharing and voting for bread recipes, baking and donating funds. Go and take a look.


And moving on from that, and because I am in dire need of some silliness after a very stressful week of medical tests which assure me I'm getting old and am generally falling to bits...

A few weeks ago, I was awarded this


And then last week I was awarded it two more times. Thanks to wonderful and very special Val and to irrepressible and hilarious Laquet! Thing is, the last two times the award came with a meme… hmm... and I’ve figured, because some silliness is good for the soul, that I may as well do the thing. It’s a one word meme, which I feel sure I will find a little challenging… And there’s another point. As you may well know, there is a certain alien chicken of my acquaintance who has a strange perversion; she actually likes doing the bloody things. So on her weekly check in, yes, she does do that you know, gets into my head about once a week with her telepathic powers just so she can tell me what a mess humans are continuing to make of the planet. You have no idea how loudly she’s been cackling about the credit crisis… If I hear another “I told you so” and “Well, what in the name of the Great Corn Cob, did you expect”, I am going to… I am going to… No, never mind what I’m going to do, I can hear her listening and it’s just not worth the bother.

So, okay, we’re going to take turns to do this meme. I’m going first. Yes, I am. So there… Ouch! Guinea fowl in the garden, alien chickens in my head… I don’t want to even contemplate where it might end. Ouch!

Where is your mobile phone? bedroom
Where is your significant other? bedroom
Your hair colour? brown
Your mother? hmmm
Your father? offplanet
Your favourite thing? books
Your dream last night? none
Your dream goal? published
The room you're in? study
Your hobby? photography
Your fear? none
Where do you want to be in 6 years? published
Where were you last night? bed
What you're not? dead
One of your wish-list items? published
Where you grew up? CapeTown
The last thing you did? typed
What are you wearing? trousers
Your TV? off
Your pets? wild
Your computer? on
Your mood? yes
Missing someone? no
Your car? fast
Something you're not wearing? feathers
Favourite shop? bookstore
Your summer? hot
Love someone? yes
Your favourite colour? rainbow
When is the last time you laughed? today
Last time you cried? lastMonday



Alright, shove over then, it’s my turn!
What happened to please?
Please? Oh pul-lease! Ba-kaak!

First of all, hello you lot – pleased to see me again? And hello to all Vanilla’s new bloggy friends. I hope you’re all nice people… There will be pecking if you are not.
Now…

Where is your mobile phone? Oh lord, humans! What’s wrong with telepathy, I ask you.

Atyllah, it’s a one word meme…
Says who?
The rules.
And whose rules might those be? Huh? Huh?
Erm, the person who created the meme.
And that’s important how?
Er… okay, you’ve got me there.
Don’t I always. Now, shut up and let me get on with it. My way…. I did it my way…
You’re not going to start singing are you?
You have a problem with that?
No, of course not, sing if you must, I’m just going out into the garden…
Ba-kaaaaak! Now were was I? And do I have your undivided attention? I so sincerely hope so…

Where is your significant other? Oh pul-lease, who’d want one – and only one at that…
Your hair colour? Yellow, orange, red – feathers if you please!
Your mother? Enjoying a corn syrup cocktail on Novapulse.
Your father? Trying to reason with Granny Were...
Your favourite thing? Corn and bugs and worms and telling Vanilla what to do.
Your dream last night? Pecking at a giant corn cob. Ha! Get your head around that Freud!
Your dream goal? To rule the world, muahahahahahahaaaa…
The room you're in? I’m not in a room, I’m in Vanilla’s head...
Your hobby? Riling humans
Your fear? Pul-lease, we Novapulse chickens know no fear!
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Hmm, now you see this is a tough one, it depends on several factors…

Atyllah, it’s supposed to be one word, remember.
Go. Away.
Yes, okay, going.

Where were you last night? Where I am today. Novapulse.
What you're not? Afraid.
One of your wish-list items? Multiversal peace and order.
Where you grew up? Novapulse. See, I can do this one word thing…
The last thing you did? Had tea with Granny Were while she telepathically communed with Great Aunt Aggie on Andromeda.
What are you wearing? Feathers?
Your TV? Stupid things, who’d want one?
Your pets? Pets? Pets! How incredibly undignified. Who’d force another being into that kind of subservience? Oh wait, you lot do…
Your computer? I am far too evolved to require a computer.
Your mood? Amused.
Missing someone? No, why would I, we are eternally interconnected.
Your car? I don’t have a car. I do, however, have a very nice little spacepod. It’s silver and can be cloaked to be invisible.
Something you're not wearing? Clothes.
Favourite shop? Shopping is a sign of a materialistic culture. We don’t have shops on Novapulse.
Your summer? Seasons are part of the human condition. Novapulse is a domed and regulated environment.
Love someone? Exactly what do you mean by “someone”?
Your favourite colour? Red and yellow and orange.
When is the last time you laughed? Today.
Last time you cried? Chickens don’t cry.

Right, I’m done.
Are you going to get out of my head now?
Hmm, I think so, it’s too crowded in here. You really should write that new story, it will at least make it less cluttered, and then you could also stop thinking about…
Yes, alright, I get your point. Bye, Atyllah.
Over and out, Vanilla.

Yes, well, what can I say…
I know I’m supposed to pass on this award, but I’ve already done so, so if you’ve can’t think of anything to blog about, feel free to nick this meme and if you like, award yourself the, er, award.

You humans speak such a damnable language…
Atyllah!
Muahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa…

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